I mean, this movie seems to have been hyped to hell and back by everyone on Letterboxd. How could it be bad?

But that is its problem, it is not bad, not really. The actors are playing fairly well. The film does not take itself too seriously, having its funny moments throughout. Cinematography and atmosphere are both pretty on-point, especially in the age of low-effort horror films. Sentimental moments, while few and far between, are also executed in a nice balance, without taking away from the overall funny-ness. It even manages to be halfway scary and anxiety-inducing, which is commendable when your lead scary monster is an admittedly pretty actress.

(Spoilers Below this Point)

I am perfectly capable of taking into account the suspension of disbelief - OK, the stick really makes the wishes come true. OK, its being sold on a corner hippie crystal shop. OK, you can't break multiple sticks to take multiple wishes. OK, there is a whole company behind this stick that has a phone line and everything. OK the guy on the phone line seems to know everything and is an evil genie of shorts. OK, the stick takes a couple of hours to effect the poor girl. OK, fine even. I am willing to accept all this for a horror movie, its fun and stuff, no problem.

However, why is this girl crazy? Like genuinely? Why is she crazy? She loves him more than anyone ever, he is God himself, she would give his life for him etc. But, why does that immediately make her into a homicidal maniac? At first, you think that it might have something to do with the fact that she gets jealous. But she makes up in the middle of the night to scream at him and move around with the flower jar? Huh? Why? She is split in two personalities and the real her suffers in perpetuity? Why does that happen? Why did she kill the guy with the pistol? What did he ever do to her?

So the only conclusion that can be drawn here is that the wooden stick is evil. She's being a demon, doing demon stuff. Like not moving from the spot he left her in before he goes to work, staying there for hours creepily. But this is so unrelated to her loving him (very much!!) that it bears no explanation... other than "lmao, demon stick ig".

Ultimately this is my problem with the movie. Its not that it isn't fun, or that it is boring, or that it is cringy. Its interesting and seems to have a lot of out-there ideas, that sadly never come to fruition. In the end I came out of the cinema thinking that it could have been leagues better, instead of the whole point being "Demon stick! now something loco happens!". If it truly leaned into this absurdity a bit more of course, it would be justified. Instead, it exists in this weird halfway point where it tries to be somewhat grounded, defeating the whole point and "mid-difying" the whole thing.